PRESSURE TO REMEMBER


​Joan was a participant in a small storytelling group at a local memory care unit.   A soft-spoken woman, her dementia affected her ability to process a question and formulate her response.  Her verbal skills were intact for if asked to read she could with ease.  What I learned through Joan’s form of dementia was that the pressure to respond was the inhibiting factor.  What I continue to learn is how dementia affects individuals in different ways. 
 
As I work with clients or you work with your own loved ones, we witness those whose memories and oral communication skills are very much intact.  Tom’s family wanted Legacies to capture his story.  He didn’t suffer from memory loss recalling each stage of his life script verbatim.  Marilyn, another Legacies client brought forward more of her narrative than her family had ever heard once we broke the stories down into manageable memories.
 
In both instances, I found that the stress-to-recall behavior to be integral in framing the account of a life well-lived.  Whether working with individuals capable of full-scale recollections or those experiencing early stages of memory loss, it is helpful to recognize the role that stress plays as we, with all good intentions -  solicit memories.  
 
With the expanding research on Dementia, updated information surfaces each day to help us identify early signs of this life-robbing disease.  The distinction between Dementia and Alzheimer’s often causes confusion.  According to the National Institute on Aging (NIA), Dementia is a brain disorder that affects communication and performance of daily activities. Alzheimer’s disease is a form of dementia that specifically affects parts of the brain that control thought, memory and language.  In other words, Dementia is the umbrella with Alzheimer’s as one of many diseases covering a wide range of symptoms.   
 
For those who appreciate visual representations the Alzheimer’s Association provides an excellent Brain Tour at www.alz.org/braintour.   The Brain Tour illustrates the disease using user-friendly terminologies and images describing the disease and its physiological effects on us.  Learn about terms like: Thinking Wrinkles and Neuron Forest.  It’s well worth a visit.   
 
Like a forest regenerating itself, we find memories deep within the ecosystem of a forest floor reaching to find new life in the overstory, the uppermost canopy of the present day.   No matter where or when you begin - don’t get caught in the “I wish I would have” mantra.  For so many, time slips away before they know it. 
 
Get Started ... before it’s too late! 

~ Mary

Mary Patricia Voell
Legacies, LLC | Personal, Family & Organizational Historian

 
ANNOUNCING

THE STORY WITHIN | A Hwy K Get-A-Way | August 24, 2019 | 9:00 – 4:00
Join other fabulous, spirited, insightful and creative women to pen a page or two during a unique guided autobiography day-long retreat. 
Email info@legaciesstories.com for more information.   

THE MAKING OF A FAMILY HISTORIAN

- Online Classes begin October 2019 | Learn more at http://www.legaciesstories.com/classes.html

- UW Fond du Lac | September 17, 24, October 1, 8, 15 | Visit https://uwosh.edu/fdl/continuing-education/ for a continuing education catalog.

​BACK IN TIME - TO A PLACE & A STORY
 

​During the hottest season on record, I think of the Voell homestead method of beating the heat - pulled shades, closed curtains, and lots of fans.  Pure and simple.  More Wisdom and Advice from the Great Depression Years by Lisa Bedford reminds us how our parents and ancestors survived another time of great challenge. 
 
Out of necessity, life was simpler like #15, an age-old air-cooling method before electricity-eating AC.  With canning season around the corner take note of #6 and #7.  #20 and #32 trigger memories of tuna casserole, radish sandwiches and P.B. & J., #26 reminds us that ‘retirement’ is a new later-in-life notion, and #35 and #40 demonstrate the ‘art of survival’.
 
As your family gathers for summer reunions and special events use these valuable memory starters to uncover stories of times experienced and remembered by a passing generation – before it’s too late!

More wisdom and advice from the Great Depression years
From:  http://thesurvivalmom.com/survival-wisdom-great-depression/

1. 1.  Families traveled to wherever the work happened to be. They stuck together as much as possible.
2. Life insurance policies were cashed in to try and survive for just a few months longer in their “normal” worlds.
3. Meals were simpler than those we eat today and, therefore, cheaper. There were virtually no prepared foods at grocery stores.
4. Families learned to shop at the very last minute on a Saturday night to get bargains on fresh produce that would go bad over the weekend. (Stores were closed on Sundays.)
5. Learning how to forage and find edible plants helped many families fill their dinner plates. Things like nuts and wild asparagus were treats and often entire families would grab a pile of gunny sacks and head to the good foraging areas for the day. Finding free food was how some families survived.
6. Housewives were judged by how many jars she had “put up” during harvest season. Women would show off their full pantries with pride.
7. To add different types of food to their meals, families swapped produce with each other.
8. For many, there was no electricity or a refrigerator, so you just cooked only what could be eaten at that one meal.
9. In some communities, there were group gardens on empty lots. Everyone had their own small plot and could grow whatever they wanted.
10. Many worked multiple part-time jobs, waking up before dawn and falling asleep long after dark.
11. Those with just a little bit more than others found odd jobs around their homes or property to provide employment to others.
12. “Depression Soup” was a real thing! It contained anything and everything you might have in the kitchen or was donated by others. To this day, some say it was the best soup they ever tasted.
13. Some enterprising women would wake in the early morning hours and prepare dozens of meals to sell to workers from their vehicles.
14. Fabric feed sacks were recycled and became “feed sack dresses.” For some, it was an embarrassment, an obvious sign of poverty, but others wore them with pride. A family with many chickens, and therefore plenty of feed sacks, might be the best dressed in the neighborhood!
15. Hanging wet sheets over doorways was a way to cool down a room or house during the summer. Hot air was slightly cooled as it passed through the wet fabric.
16. Some communities organized “surprise parties”, in which everyone would pull together a large amount of food and other necessities, including cash. One by one, each family was selected to be the recipient of the surprise party.
17. A jack-of-all-trades could often find work when others couldn’t. It paid to know a bit about plumbing, carpentry, painting, and home repairs.
18. Stories from the Great Depression years are filled with incidents that illustrate one act of kindness after another. In spite of incredible hardships, people could still find ways to encourage others with words of blessing or unexpected help.
19. Missions were there to feed people but many of those missions eventually ran out of money.
20. All food was made from scratch, and this fascinating book chronicles the culinary history of the Great Depression.
21. To what extent any individual or family was affected by the Great Depression depended on large part where they lived. Not all areas were affected in the same way.
22. Hunting and fishing were major ways in which families were fed.
23. Everyone, including the kids, found ways to earn money. There was a team mentality that brought everyone together for a common goal.
24. Unfortunately, loss of income wasn’t a good enough excuse to not pay rent or the mortgage, although some landlords, in particular, were willing to extend credit.
25. There was virtually no sense of entitlement. Everyone knew they would only survive if they worked hard to do so.
26. At this time there was no such thing as “retirement”. Everyone worked until they became physically unable to continue.
27. Some towns had “welfare budgets”. Money was loaned from the town to individuals, but there was a strict keeping of books. Some towns even published in their newspapers how much each person owed and repayment was expected.
28. There was a sense of dignity in even the lowliest of jobs. One woman tells the story of a notions salesman who visited their home every few months. He looked very dapper and wore expensive looking clothing, even as a door-to-door salesman.
29. The Great Depression affected people in all walks of life. Only the most elite were immune from its effects.
30. When banks closed, you were left with, literally, only the cash in your pockets or hidden away at home. Everything else was GONE.
31. Many discovered strength through optimism and looked at their disadvantages as personal challenges that could be overcome with ingenuity and hard work.
32. Foods that would normally have not been eaten became commonplace at the kitchen table, such as bean sandwiches and codfish gravy. Recipes from this era provide a fascinating look at the day to day life of average people.
33. Many mothers learned to “not be hungry” as they gave larger portions to their husbands and kids.
34. Food prices at that time were fairly high when compared with wages. For example, a general laborer made $2 per day. The WPA paid $1 per day. But bread was 10 cents a loaf, milk 8 cents a quart, and eggs 7 cents/dozen.
35. The seasons determined what you ate.
36. Walls were covered with everything from mud/clay, scrap pieces of wallpaper, newspapers, and tar paper.
37. Homemakers still took pride in their homes, keeping them as clean as possible, even those who lived in areas affected by the Dust Bowl. One mom made a couch from old bedsprings and stuffed homemade cushions with unginned cotton.
38. Many spent their days walking the streets looking for work, anything at all that could bring in a few dollars or cents for their families. Often a “job” was just an individual task, payment was made when the task was completed, and the worker went on to look for the next job.
39. People were grateful. Grateful for any kindness, any blessing. That attitude carried many of them through the Great Depression years and they now look back on them with fondness.
40. The hardened end of a slab of bacon was sold for almost nothing and could be used to season just about everything in the kitchen!
41. There actually were government inspectors of different types during the Great Depression years. They had the authority to shut down many different types of home businesses. Some did, some didn’t.
42. The Sears Roebuck catalog was truly the book of dreams for many people — not just kids!
43. Stories from the Great Depression years are filled with incidents that illustrate one act of kindness after another. In spite of incredible hardships, people could still find ways to encourage others with words of blessing or unexpected help.
      

A Must Read for Family Historians  

Were your ancestors part of the great dust storms of Nebraska, Oklahoma, Kansas, Colorado, New Mexico, the Dakotas and Texas?  A national book award winner The Worst Hard Time by Timothy Egan provides an historical backdrop that gives voice to survivors of the epic natural disaster – The Great American Dust Bowl.     

Let us know how we can help capture your family story. 
 
LEGACIES, LLC | Personal, Family & Organizational Historians
The STORY Experts!

Your Personal Historian,
 
    ~ Mary
 
ANNOUNCING

The Making of a Family Historian
Online Classes beginning September 2019
 Learn more at www.legaciesstories.com

RESCUING HISTORY

The mission of Legacies is to - Rescue History. 
 
Where many clearly see the value of writing their story, the story of a loved one or family - the third stage of the Legacies model, the earlier stages of organization and research are just as important and integral to the process.
 
Some clients come to the organizational step literally from the ground floor, hauling out the boxes and sitting on the floor or at a table sorting, tossing, identifying piles of documents and photos without names or dates - chaotic and disorganized.  One individual didn’t know he had an entire box of one family line for he had never opened the box that came from “Who knows where.”  Another, after years of feeling inundated, now has her family lines numerically filed for easy access as further research and writing begins.  “I now know what and where the information is.  It’s heaven having all my archival tools at my fingertips.  I didn’t know there were systems to get me organized.”

How often have you thought of attacking the boxes that shouted for your attention?  How often do ancestral faces call out to be identified, recognized, and brought into new light making them part of your storytelling?  How often has the task seemed so overwhelming that you’ve given up, replacing the cover with a regretful “Later.”  Yet, like a horror story, the voices continue to call out for you to take the first step, before it’s too late.    

Researcher Beware.  I hate to be the naysayer about all the online research and DNA excitement of today’s craze  but this current trend reminds me how easy it is to jump on a bandwagon, wanting the prize without doing the hard work.  Most don’t realize that there are many inaccuracies in the data and only a small percentage of information is available online even though thousands of documents are added daily.

Like Dorothy found in the Wizard of Oz, the faces and names, dates and most importantly, stories lie closer to home, within your own backyard, the fading images in family archives, libraries, historical, genealogical societies and museums, state/county/local resources, family interviews, churches, military, newspapers, letters, postcards and postmarks - - all play a role in liberating nuclear and extended family narratives.     

Years ago, a quote crossed my desk.  One has to be a certain age to remember actress Loretta Young (1913-2000), but I believe she was quoted as saying, “Elastic is the curse of women.”  In other words, once we moved into elastic and expanding clothing, we’ve lost touch with our true size. 

This may be a stretch (excuse the pun), but storage bins and spaces are the bane of those trying to rescue and preserve their history.  It’s easier to put it away in an ‘out-of-sight, out-of-mind’ plastic bin then explore what treasures may lie within.  “When I retire and have time,” or “I’ll get to it this winter,” are common mantras.  I’m not suggesting that we not use (sorry for the double negative) today’s storage possibilities for they protect items from moisture and deterioration.  But consider organizing and adding a Pedigree Chart - a GPS for genealogy those who don't know - Aunt Greta from Grandma Cora.  You are the the present family history window to the past.  Donald Hall in Essays after Eighty reminds us, “Someday, no one will remember what I remember.”  You are the bridge from the past to the future generation. Help them find their way back in time.

Each generation takes a turn unraveling and revealing more of their family history.  Each generation has first-hand accounts, access to different technology, new abilities to record and preserve, but no matter your competence,  take the time now, before it’s too late.

Legacies can help you rescue your history.  The Making of a Family Historian classes begin this fall. Join a global classroom for dynamic discussion, lifelong learning and family history making.
 
Online

Face-to-Face Zoom 17 Week Series begins October 2, 2019. For descriptions, schedule and downloadable and online registration visit: http://www.legaciesstories.com/classes.html .

Onsite classes

UW-Fond du Lac | 5 Weeks | September 17 – October 15 | 10:00 – 12:00 | https://ce.uwc.edu/fond-du-lac/catalog/the-making-of-a-family-historian.

UW-Milwaukee Osher Institute | Setting the Stage – October 2 | Organization – October 9, 16, 23, 30 | Research – November 6, 13, 20, December 4, 11 | Writing – January 6, 15, 22, 29 | Production – February 5, 12, 19, 26 | https://uwm.edu/sce/program_area/osher-lifelong-learning-institute/
 
The STORY Expert.

~ Mary

INSPIRATION

Where do you find inspiration? 

For those tending the up and coming generation, many stand like generational sentries illuminating a past and instilling values for a ‘future yet unknown’,  delighting in grandchildren who see the world through unblemished eyes. 

How about those lucky enough to travel, gathering sights and sounds from exotic ports of call?
 
For this ‘time traveler’, my inspirations come in many forms, from recognizing the link(s) between our gray skies and global warming, to congratulating myself for figuring out where my contacts went in Gmail, to wondering why my Christmas cactus blooms in June.    

Inspiration is everywhere.  It’s in the books I read where my habitual underlining looks like – redacting – but at least I can read why something caught my inner muse. I wish there was time and space to share all the layers that Derrick Jensen in The Culture of Make Believe reveals.  His writings explore the lines of thought and experience that connect the atrocities of our culture throughout history.  Extraordinarily well written but at times difficult to grasp.   

Words intrigue me.  A simple word like ‘lists,’ took me down the proverbial rabbit hole to explore why, at least in our family, we jot down whatever is flowing through our minds on scraps of paper.  Even while working on parish archives, I find my parents scribbled notes in and on 50-year-old documents.   Then thanks to Brain Pickings, an inventory of cross-disciplinary interestingness, spanning art, science, design, history, and philosophy, where Ray Bradbury’s piece on Creativity and List Making created an association between my scribbles and my hunger for creative thought.  Then in Parker Palmer’s There is a Season in which he poses it as an “intuitive hunch that may turn into a greater insight.” 

The three-dimensional visuals of film fill me with historical material to bring to interviews, triggering hidden memories not otherwise brought to light.   A perfect example was the Netflix movie Circus, a well-done documentary on the history of the beloved past time.  How about an oldie, Yankee Doodle Dandy (1942) starring James Cagney about George M. Cohen’s life?  Our family long theorized where our youngest brother’s name George Michael came from, only to find out that George M. stood for George Michael. Mystery solved?  And a recent library find, The Woman in the Iron Coffin:  The Life of a Free Black Woman in 19th Century New York, a 90-minute journey of genealogical discovery and burial practice knowledge.   

Remember when we used to walk to the tune of our new-fangled 8-track cassette player or square CD players?  I-phones have certainly made it easier to listen to the world while walking.  One favorite listening partner is NPR’s Shankar Vedantam on Hidden Brain who uses science and storytelling to reveal the unconscious patterns that drive human behavior, shape our choices and direct our relationships.


Music continues to stimulate me and quiets my ever-present mind-traffic.  2018 uncovered Jim Scott, a singer/songwriter and classical guitarist.  His May Your Life Be Like a Song, touches my almost 70-year-old heart.  The lyrics and vocal of Wanting Memories by Sweet Honey in the Rock say it all.  “I’m sitting here wanting memories to teach me, to see the beauty in the world through my own eyes.”  And of course, Fragile, with Sting and Stevie Wonder.  Stevie reminds us ‘how fragile we are’ and inspires me as I listen harder while traveling with each raconteur down through layers of time living vicariously through their narratives. 
 
Incorporating music into my many presentations is now a must. Give a listen, for we all know how music calms the ‘too-busy’ beast.   Against this backdrop, inspiration weaves its way through my life as a storyteller who wants to share her way of seeing.    

Thank you for your time.   How can Legacies help you capture your story? 
 
Legacies, LLC | Personal, Family & Organizational Historian

The STORY Experts

Legacies On-Line Classes:  The Making of a Family Historian begins in September.  Learn how you can become a family historian at http://www.legaciesstories.com/classes.html

, ​Mary’s got her groove back.  Her blog groove that is.  Writing most days, I’m well-oiled to share a mixture of learning and discovery with those in the Legacies community.  Each entrepreneur needs to find the right vehicle to reach their audience, and since, I don’t do windows, Facebook, LinkedIn, Twitter or tweet et. al., for I find my well, my writing resources are fuller and richer than present channels offer, the Reflections blog was re-born. 

Welcome.

Like the lyrics from Carousal “June is Busting Out All Over,” at the same time that nature reveals herself in full color, this story-filled girl can’t keep her ideas down.  Working with so many distinctive storytellers these past years has filled my files with tremendous insight and expertise in the art and craft of story-telling, capturing, writing and producing, and has brought incredible joy. 

Life as a writer can be creatively isolating at times.  But without the sounds of the city, I’m surrounded by big skies and quiet days and dark night; Cedar Waxwings enjoying the pine fruits; Coopers Hawk being attacked by a family of Red-winged Blackbirds as she gathers her rodent dinner; the periodic sighting of a Hummingbird; the birth of four House Wrens in my back door wreath;  frogs in basement window wells; a Red Bellied Woodpecker bringing joy to my heart at each sighting; and the Mourning Dove parents who find comfort in my flower boxes enough to lay their eggs and raise their young’uns to literally, leave the nest, and I find inspiration and peace.     
 
The country stillness allows for focus on each new project, and teaching and presentation development both on stage and off.  How Legacies can help you save a story, a life? 

In REFLECTIONS, I hope to share a window into my multi-faceted world of story. I invite you to travel with me on the first and third Sundays of the month, for you are truly a companion on a journey.    
 
The Story Experts
Legacies | Personal, Family & Organizational Historians 

~ Mary
 
ANNOUNCING  

Legacies Classes
The Making of A Family Historian   

On-Line
See Attached Description & Schedule

On-Site
 UW Oshkosh | Fond du Lac | Fox Valley Continuing Education – Fall 2019 | https://uwosh.edu/uwfdl/continuing-education/        

UW Milwaukee | Osher Institute – Spring 2020 | https://uwm.edu/sce/program_area/osher-lifelong-learning-institute/
               



        

WHERE WILL ALL THE STORIES GO? 
 
The following ideas are only the beginning of practical and creative possibilities to capture and catapult stories forward for future audiences. 

The Spiritual
Those in hospice care understand the depository of the heart. Some mysteries will be answered.  Some will remain unanswered.  Some will open old wounds.  Some will heal.
 
The Gathering of the Tribes
Narrative Transport (N.T.) Oral History. N.T. is a theory used by psychologists suggesting that stories told through generations do more than present a picture.  Telling of stories by our elders adds a dimension of respect thus an element of memory and recall.   Take advantage of family gatherings of all kinds when by the touch of a button, history is recorded. 

The Practical
Local, state and national libraries and historical societies welcome family stories and collections.  Explore The Church of Latter Day Saints, the Library of Congress, search Family Tree Magazine and Cyndi’s List for hundreds of outlets to find and place stories, and of course visit Ancestry.com to uncover all kinds of links to your lineage.  Don’t disregard past newspapers, magazines, historical novels, or organizational documents that recorded in detail elements of a family history.       
 
Old School
Written communication still rules!  For centuries stories have resided in attics and basements, trunks, bibles and boxes.  Uncover them.  Bring them to life.  These treasures tell of a time or place revealing story and context.  Read through the letters, cards and Christmas letters filled with family specific information. Look at dates.  Do the math.  Save a younger generation’s e-mails (if they still use e-mail).  Transcribe old diaries and journals.  They are already hieroglyphics to the present generation. (Hint:  There are websites that help decipher early script.) 
 
The Arts
Others are saved in music and song, art, poetry, and dance.  Think about the traditional holiday favorite, the Nutcracker, or opera, nursery rhymes or the rap of our present day artists.  Take your teens to Community Story Circles, Slams, and Moth-type events.
 
The Joy of Photos. Or not.
We’re horrified when we hear that a photo album was tossed because no one could identify the characters.  The ever present Kodak curse (my term).  Toss with great discretion. Pass onto family members, museums or historical societies.  Take time to capture who and when.  Look for clues.   
 
From Analogue to Digital - Old Movies / Video / Records / Radio
Talk to experts regarding the latest digital format.  Always retain the original.  You never know when a new technology will appear on the scene.  Don’t disregard vinyl.  It was the recording technology of an era that if destroyed will be lost forever.  I can’t say enough about radio – good radio that is.  
 
Senior Living Environments / Funeral Homes / Cemeteries
Millions of the ‘greatest generation’ are left in the care of others.  Consider resident histories taken at the time of admission and on-going stories told and recorded during their stay.  Many offer new stories prompted by their peers or when collections of residents are compiled.  After a loved one has passed have the family inquire into accessing resident and activity files. 

Funeral Homes and Cemeteries websites archive stories told not only by families, but strangers who may have been touched by a loved one.  At funeral services, ask someone to record the stories during the eulogy.   
 
Private or Published
Who is your family historian? Many families have a genealogist or storywriter in-house, but don’t know that a 4th cousin twice removed living halfway across the world is tracking your family history.  Reach out and compare notes. Begin your own family book.  Is there a published book in which your family name was referenced with an attached story?  
 
New School
Where to begin in an ever evolving sea.  Device d‘ jour | Zoom | Skype | The Cloud | Photo collection sites | Family Websites & E- Newsletters | Video | Insta Gram | Twitter | Facebook | Google Play.  
 
TV, Documentaries, History Gathering Initiatives
The popularity of programs.  Finding Your Roots | Who Do You Think You Are | Genealogy Roadshow | Generations Project | Family Tree | Ancestors in the Attic | Faces of America | Long Lost Family | An American Family | Stories We Tell (2012) | Story Corps

Organizations | Associations
How do you round out your professional networking?  National Storytelling Network | Story Circle Network | National Memoir Writing | What groups do you belong to?   
 
Beyond Books 
We cherish books, photos and video, but what other unique and lasting creations could tell a story?  Link up with artists in your area to creatively design other keepsakes like quilts and calendars.    
 
Scientific Research
Memory loss is a hallmark of many present day life-robbing diseases.  Gone are the details of memories that at one time were easily accessible.  Neuroscientists, biologists and neurologists are pioneering research in the study of brain research, memory and storytelling.  Professor Susumu Tonegawa suggests, “that even if a memory seems to be gone, it is still there.  It’s a matter of how to retrieve it.” 
 

 

Recently at a networking meeting, a woman mentioned that an album created for a deceased loved one was put into the casket—for safe keeping. That was a new one for me. Were her stories gone forever? 

Before printing, before virtual communication, stories were kept alive orally. Across cultures, shamans, troubadours, minstrels, yarn spinners, tale spinners, orators and narrators held prominent roles in tribes and nations, passing on their skills to the next generation.  
 
In this oral history tradition, “storytelling was never done for sheer entertainment, for the stories were a record of proud nations. Stories contained information about values, ways of life, patterns of environment, growing seasons, and religious detail,” writes Ojibway author Lenor Kesshig-Tobias in All My Relations. 
 
Story redundancy was key to their value over time as they were repeated through decades with little variation. Embedded in the tradition were the words used and the time told. Seanchai (Irish), Shamachie (Scottish), Cantadora (Mexican), Cuentista (Tejanos/Texans of Mexican background) to name only a few, sang their history forward. But in our fast paced world, is the role of the designated storyteller lost? Who are the present day conduits of our story? 
 
There are a multitude of vehicles to pass on stories, from the spiritual to the practical, old school and new school, the arts, analogue to digital, senior living environments, funeral homes, cemeteries, documentaries, and organizations. There is pioneering research in the area of memory. We’ve only just begun to find new and creative ways to share the human story. 
 
Where will all the stories go? 
 
As personal historians we have the responsibility to actively bring our history into the life of new generations. We need to teach young’ns to listen and learn about their history. Hundreds of family history projects and ideas for all ages (including teens) can be found in libraries and with simple online searches.    
 
Old techniques have become new again as millennials who are coming of age begin to own the value of nostalgia and reminiscence. 
 
Remember, because of our work, this time and place in our history will circulate as long as we continue to give wings to the stories. I think of the African-American spiritual Children Go Where I Send Thee (author unknown). Where will our stories go? They will go where we send them. It’s up to us. 
 
Where will all the stories go?
 
On my website, I have compiled a list of practical and personal ideas for how we can “capture and release” the stories of our lives and the stories told to us.   http://www.legaciesstories.com/legacies-blog I’ve included ideas for spiritual sharing, oral history recordings, practical advice on places and ways to save stories online and elsewhere—with both “old school” and “new school” methods. The options are as varied as the stories and the story tellers. Remember, we can never really know where the stories will go—but we must do our part to make sure that they continue on their journeys for generations yet to come.

When I was considering this post, I recalled an article with the same title that I had clipped and saved a couple of years ago. The article was a conversation between writer P.L. Travers (author of Mary Poppins) and Laurens van der Post, a man who, from the 1940s through 1980s, was known as a best-selling author, environmentalist, and advisor to heads of state (he was a close friend of Prince Charles and Margaret Thatcher). However, after his death in 1996 his reputation was questioned when some biographers suggested he might have embellished (others say “made up”) much of his own story.
 
The Truth Be Told
 
For van der Post, the real truth may still be undiscovered, but it made me wonder, where is the truth in our stories? When do we move from nonfiction to creative nonfiction? I’m sure we all come across clients that present challenges to our fact checking. A potential client once told me that capturing the story of her sister would be most difficult because she no longer knows what is true and what isn’t. Working with the elderly, I move from those whose memories are fading or lost to those filled with more memories than we can capture. I call this continuum “From Memories Lost to Memory Filled.” Sometimes our writing expertise is called into play to fill in the blanks and embellish for historical significance and readability. 
 
In the article, P.L. Travers asked Van der Post, “Where do the stories go?” He responded that we “can’t ask what we can do to get them back but know only that it has to be done.” This statement reinforces our mission. 
 
History Shapers
 
Experienced personal historians have spent years developing their craft, and they realize that as we listen and capture story in all its forms, we layer our story teller’s story with our own understanding, our view, our time and place. 
 
Even when transcribed verbatim, our own tone and texture can add a layer of perspective.  Through no deliberate intention, we either intensify or diminish the lessons learned or the stories told.  
 
Think of the words used by the story teller that can be different from those of the story writer, the chronicler in any medium: terminology that is long gone, cultural phrases, values, and viewpoints. The world lived by the narrator — a world of dust storms, world wars, global depressions—is different from the world of the writer.  
 
Before we can fully answer the question “where do all the stories go,” we must acknowledge that stories journey through many people and places before they settle in, if they ever do.   The act of capturing a story is not static. Stories move through us in time. The person who lived the stories and the person the stories are told to, each wear it, live it, own it, and then pass it on. Stories are fluid, like a river, and, as a recent client described his fishing expeditions, we “catch and release” the stories told to us.
 
The Value of Story in the Future
 
Many of us hear that today’s children are not interested in stories of their ancestors. My response is always “Give them time, but be ready when they are.” Like an internal clock, come mid-40s or early 50s, once other life demands have settled, an individual’s need for answers surfaces.   
 
P.L. Travers suggests that our offspring don’t see the value of story, “having become disconnected to its value [like their disconnect to the earth].  Lacking the extended family, separated from the tribe, and therefore from the stories, what [do] they have to lean upon.  Already the stories are becoming unavailable to those who need them most.”
 
There is the key. It is our job to make the stories available.
 
There is strength in reminiscing, the coming to terms with our earlier selves. Remember the scene in Mary Poppins when out of an “empty” carpet bag, Mary pulls out all sorts of everyday magical items? What can we find if we look back and in to our past?
 
My favorite example of reaching back to bring history forward is portrayed in Steven Spielberg’s 1997 film Amistad, based on the 1839 true story of 53 illegally purchased African slaves, being transported from Cuba to the U.S., who stage a successful mutiny. Former president John Quincy Adams argued on behalf of the slaves before the U.S. Supreme Court, eventually determining the Africans to be free men. (http://www.history.com/topics/amistad-case ) In the movie, Cinque, the leader of the slave group, assures Adams that they won’t be facing the court alone. Adams agrees, saying they will have right on their side, but Cinque explains what he means: “I meant my ancestors. I will call into the past, far back to the beginning of time, and beg them to come and help me at the judgment. I will reach back and draw them into me. And they must come, for at this moment, I am the whole reason they have existed at all.”  (https://cinema-fanatic.com/2014/04/24/movie-quote-of-the-day-amistad-1997-dir-steven-spielberg/)
 
It is true for all of us: At this moment, we are the reason our ancestors have existed.
 
Next week, in part 2 of this post, I will look at how our stories are lifelines to the past and present and explore how we can grab on to them.
 
(End part 1)

Summer.  A time for gearing down.  As an experienced multi-tasker this can be as difficult as running a marathon.  Throughout my life folks commented on my limitless energy.  Was it my personality?  My astrological sign? Diet Coke?  Or just me?  Bob, a lifelong farmer told me one day to ‘gear down’.  I loved that.  I can hear the gears of his orange Allis Chalmers tractor shift down as he worked in Wisconsin’s corn fields.  
 
My own senior chapter began recently and along with it came an unplanned reduction in speed and activity. I won’t use the ‘r’ word (retirement), but gone is the need to multi-task and as my sister-in-law reminded me, “It, whatever it is, will still be there tomorrow.”  But stopping completely is not in my genes. I hope to work at my storied craft until my 90’s maybe stopping long enough to engross myself in that which lies before me like pausing to take in Ireland’s Cliffs of Moher.  (Photo by Mattisson Francis Voell, 2004)
 
But what does multi-tasking have to do with capturing stories.  It came to my attention that a growing body of research indicates that multi-tasking in fact takes a toll on at least our short term memory, and in time, our long term memory.  The research suggests that even though we think we are accomplishing two or three things at once – the question is, to what end?  In 2009 Ruth Pennebaker wrote, “… researchers at Stanford University published a study showing that the most persistent multi-taskers perform badly in a variety of tasks. They don’t focus as well as nonmulti-taskers. This phenomenon is now labeled the “distraction economy.”  http://bits.blogs.nytimes.com/2011/04/11/multitasking-takes-toll-on-memory-study-finds | http://www.nyties.com/2009/08/30/weekinreview/30pennebaker.html | http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2014/01/25/the-cost-of-multitasking_n_4661761.html.
 
Giving Memories Time to Surface. 
 
The Legacies mission of capturing and preserving stories takes time.  It takes time, attention and focus to help guide the interviewee beyond the episodic over told Kodak stories to explore and discover the layers of life’s experiences and emotions.   

Legacies projects vary from a few months to a year or more.  We have learned that this is not a venture you rush through over a few weekends or a task on your to-do list.  Give your storyteller full attention by turning off technology.  Offer your storyteller psychological air helping to breathe life into their tales and narratives. Go beyond the surface and ask the who, what, when, where and why questions.   Whether it’s Mondays with Dad, or third Thursdays with Grandma Cora, give the care needed to uncover a life well lived.  Gear down. 
 
And as always, let us know how we can help. 

Get started ... before it’s too late! 

Mary

Mary Patricia Voell

And don't forget the many presentations that Legacies has to offer.  If you part of a senior living environment, trust attorney or estate planning associations, business groups, funeral homes, senior centers or faith based organizations looking for a program, workshop or keynote speaker, let us know.